Crazy, Stupid, Love.

00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:27,041 I heard you crying the other night. 581 00:36:28,452 --> 00:36:29,919 Didn't know what to do. 582 00:36:30,087 --> 00:36:34,888 Oh, Robbie, baby, you're 13, you're not supposed to know what to do. 583 00:36:35,059 --> 00:36:36,083 I tried Googling it. 584 00:36:36,260 --> 00:36:38,592 - You did not. - Yep. I did. 585 00:36:38,763 --> 00:36:42,255 - Well, what did you Google? - I searched "Mom crying in bed." 586 00:36:42,967 --> 00:36:45,094 What did Google say? 587 00:36:45,269 --> 00:36:50,297 Just a bunch of weird videos of moms in bed. 588 00:36:50,474 --> 00:36:52,874 Ugh. Oh, God. Okay. All right, that's enough. No more. 589 00:36:54,378 --> 00:36:56,312 Do those parental controls work at all? 590 00:36:56,914 --> 00:36:57,938 They work for me. 591 00:36:58,583 --> 00:37:02,246 Because you're a disgusting teenager, that's why. 592 00:37:03,654 --> 00:37:04,678 - Hey. - Oh, hey. 593 00:37:04,855 --> 00:37:08,723 - Bill wants to see you before you take off. - Oh. Uh, David, this is my son, Robbie. 594 00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:11,293 Robbie, this is David. 595 00:37:11,462 --> 00:37:14,989 - Um, we work together. - How you doing, buddy? 596 00:37:19,036 --> 00:37:21,027 - You all right to wait a little bit? - Yeah. 597 00:37:21,205 --> 00:37:23,901 Okay. Thanks, David. 598 00:37:36,787 --> 00:37:40,814 So, Robbie, I hear you're quite the soccer player. 599 00:37:45,596 --> 00:37:48,190 So, David, I hear you broke up my parents' marriage. 600 00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:52,866 - You are David Lindhagen, right? - Lindhagen. 601 00:37:53,037 --> 00:37:56,234 - Yeah. Here's the thing, Lindhagen. - Hagen. 602 00:37:56,407 --> 00:37:57,431 Whatever. 603 00:37:57,608 --> 00:38:00,372 In the end, she winds up back with my dad. 604 00:38:00,544 --> 00:38:03,707 He's a better guy than you are in every category. 605 00:38:03,881 --> 00:38:06,816 And she still loves him. He's not gonna give up on my mom... 606 00:38:06,984 --> 00:38:09,452 ...like I'm not gonna stop sending Jessica messages... 607 00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,520 ...that make her feel uncomfortable. 608 00:38:11,689 --> 00:38:13,680 Hey. You ready to go, honey? 609 00:38:13,858 --> 00:38:17,487 - Can we order Chinese for dinner tonight? - Yeah. Sure, honey. 610 00:38:18,496 --> 00:38:20,157 Hi, David. Get your stuff. 611 00:38:20,331 --> 00:38:21,992 - Bye, David. - See you. 612 00:38:30,174 --> 00:38:32,438 You're not gonna be able to feel your arms. 613 00:38:32,610 --> 00:38:34,305 I'll be fine. 614 00:38:34,879 --> 00:38:36,107 Jesus Christ. 615 00:38:36,314 --> 00:38:38,714 Look, let's face it, Cal, all right? 616 00:38:38,883 --> 00:38:43,252 The war between the sexes is over, and we won, okay? 617 00:38:44,588 --> 00:38:47,716 We won the second women started doing pole dancing for exercise. 618 00:38:47,892 --> 00:38:50,417 But even though we won, they still deserve our respect. 619 00:38:50,594 --> 00:38:54,223 Make them feel beautiful, listen to their problems, open the door for them. 620 00:38:54,398 --> 00:38:56,195 Would you put on some clothes, please? 621 00:38:56,367 --> 00:38:58,631 - I'm sorry, is this bothering you? - No, it's not. 622 00:38:58,836 --> 00:39:02,237 <i>My schwantz is in your face. If it's not bothering you, we got a problem.</i> 623 00:39:02,740 --> 00:39:05,004 - Okay, it bothers me. - I don't care. 624 00:39:05,176 --> 00:39:08,111 You gotta take control of your manhood, pal. You know? 625 00:39:08,279 --> 00:39:10,076 You want something, you take it. 626 00:39:10,247 --> 00:39:12,943 You don't like something, you say it. I take what I want. 627 00:39:13,117 --> 00:39:15,779 David Lindhagen certainly took what he wanted, didn't he? 628 00:39:15,953 --> 00:39:17,420 And I can guarantee you this: 629 00:39:17,588 --> 00:39:21,251 He is opening the car door for your wife right now. 630 00:39:21,425 --> 00:39:22,449 What, you passing out? 631 00:39:24,962 --> 00:39:26,429 Oh, boy. 632 00:39:38,376 --> 00:39:40,742 - I think you're ready, pal. - For what? 633 00:39:40,911 --> 00:39:45,041 To talk to a pretty lady, and take her home and show her your gift. 634 00:39:45,216 --> 00:39:46,740 No. No, I'm not. 635 00:39:46,917 --> 00:39:48,646 You're ready as you're ever gonna be. 636 00:39:48,819 --> 00:39:51,845 You play your strengths, pal. That's all any of us can do. 637 00:39:52,022 --> 00:39:54,490 I'm mysterious. 638 00:39:54,892 --> 00:39:56,416 I'm, you know, good in bed. 639 00:39:57,695 --> 00:40:00,664 And you are a, uh... 640 00:40:00,831 --> 00:40:02,765 ...you know, stable and employed adult. 641 00:40:02,933 --> 00:40:04,332 Jesus. 642 00:40:04,502 --> 00:40:06,834 You see this lady over here at 9 o'clock? 643 00:40:08,973 --> 00:40:10,167 You want me to hit on her? ...