Dumb and Dumber

00:39:19,816 --> 00:39:21,359 He got me mad. I almost like it. 495 00:39:21,526 --> 00:39:24,320 You were supposed to grab that bag so we could end this shit. 496 00:39:24,487 --> 00:39:25,613 Here's your drink, baby. 497 00:39:26,114 --> 00:39:29,242 - What I would... - The damage I can do to you. 498 00:39:29,409 --> 00:39:32,537 - Hold on a minute. - Because you were spiteful. I didn't wanna... 499 00:39:34,956 --> 00:39:38,918 That's not your problem. You didn't know. 500 00:39:39,419 --> 00:39:41,129 Get off the phone. 501 00:39:43,798 --> 00:39:45,300 Get off the pho... 502 00:39:50,263 --> 00:39:52,140 I'm sorry, Mr. Andre, you were saying? 503 00:39:52,849 --> 00:39:56,978 Look, Mental, these jokers have got a lot of money and it belongs to me. 504 00:39:57,145 --> 00:39:59,647 I wanna know who they are. What they're doing with it. 505 00:39:59,814 --> 00:40:01,024 Hey, hey, hey. 506 00:40:01,190 --> 00:40:04,110 I told you already I'm on it. All right? 507 00:40:05,653 --> 00:40:07,113 Good. 508 00:40:11,910 --> 00:40:14,537 HARRY: According to the map, we've only gone about four inches. 509 00:40:14,704 --> 00:40:16,998 You know, I don't think we have enough gas money. 510 00:40:17,165 --> 00:40:19,500 Relax. We have more than enough. 511 00:40:20,168 --> 00:40:21,502 I think you're wrong, Lloyd. 512 00:40:21,669 --> 00:40:23,588 How much you wanna bet? 513 00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:25,173 I don't bet. 514 00:40:25,340 --> 00:40:27,508 - What do you mean you don't bet? - I don't bet. 515 00:40:27,675 --> 00:40:29,218 - I don't gamble. - Pussy, pussy. 516 00:40:29,385 --> 00:40:31,554 - I never have and I never will. - Pussy. 517 00:40:31,721 --> 00:40:33,681 Yeah, right. 518 00:40:33,848 --> 00:40:36,517 I bet I can get you gambling before the end of the day. 519 00:40:36,684 --> 00:40:37,727 No way. 520 00:40:37,894 --> 00:40:39,354 - I'll give you 3-to-1 odds. - No. 521 00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:40,730 - 5-to-1. - No. 522 00:40:40,897 --> 00:40:42,357 10-to-1? 523 00:40:42,565 --> 00:40:44,067 You're on. 524 00:40:47,278 --> 00:40:49,030 - I'm gonna get you. - Uh-uh. 525 00:40:49,197 --> 00:40:50,573 Oh, yeah. 526 00:40:50,740 --> 00:40:52,867 I don't know how, but I'm gonna get you. 527 00:40:53,034 --> 00:40:55,870 - Nuh-uh. Nuh-uh. - Yeah. Oh, yeah. 528 00:40:56,871 --> 00:40:59,916 Come on, Joe. Let me do them. Let me do both of them. 529 00:41:00,083 --> 00:41:03,378 - You don't have to worry about it. - Just shut up. 530 00:41:03,544 --> 00:41:05,713 Now, we don't even know who the hell they are. 531 00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:08,633 You don't kill people you don't know. That's a rule. 532 00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,511 I want you to get up here, lie down on the front seat. 533 00:41:11,678 --> 00:41:13,054 When they pick me up... 534 00:41:13,221 --> 00:41:15,390 ...you follow us. You got that? 535 00:41:15,556 --> 00:41:18,518 Keep your shirt on. I gotta squeeze a lemon. 536 00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:27,402 JOE: Hey, hey, hey. Here they come. 537 00:41:27,902 --> 00:41:29,821 Stay down. Stay down. 538 00:41:40,999 --> 00:41:43,501 Say, are you guys going to Davenport? 539 00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:47,338 My car died and I'm late for a luncheon. 540 00:41:48,923 --> 00:41:51,926 We usually don't pick up hitchhikers... 541 00:41:52,635 --> 00:41:56,264 ...but I'm gonna go with my instinct on this one. 542 00:41:56,431 --> 00:41:58,433 Saddle up, partner. 543 00:42:00,601 --> 00:42:02,186 You're it. 544 00:42:02,353 --> 00:42:03,855 - You're it. - You're it, quitsies. 545 00:42:04,022 --> 00:42:06,441 You're it. Quitsies. No anti-quitsies. No startsies. 546 00:42:06,607 --> 00:42:07,859 - You can't do that. - Can to. 547 00:42:08,026 --> 00:42:10,778 - Can't. Stamped it. - Can too. Double stamped it. No erasies. 548 00:42:10,945 --> 00:42:13,948 Cannot. Triple stamped it. No erasies. Touch blue, make it true. 549 00:42:14,115 --> 00:42:16,659 You can't triple stamp a double stamp, Lloyd. 550 00:42:16,826 --> 00:42:19,662 You can't triple stamp a double stamp. You... Lloyd. Lloyd. 551 00:42:19,829 --> 00:42:22,749 Guys! Enough! 552 00:42:26,419 --> 00:42:27,837 Hey. 553 00:42:28,004 --> 00:42:30,923 Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world? 554 00:42:31,299 --> 00:42:33,760 [YELLING] 555 00:42:33,926 --> 00:42:37,305 Guys! Guys! Guys! 556 00:42:38,681 --> 00:42:40,391 Fellas... 557 00:42:41,476 --> 00:42:44,562 ...you think we could listen to the radio or something? 558 00:42:46,272 --> 00:42:47,982 Radio? 559 00:42:48,316 --> 00:42:50,818 Who needs a radio? Ready, Harry? 560 00:42:52,653 --> 00:42:54,489 -[SINGING] <i>Mock</i> -[SINGING] <i>Yeah</i> 561 00:42:54,655 --> 00:42:56,449 <i>-Ing -Yeah</i> 562 00:42:56,616 --> 00:42:58,367 <i>-Bird -Yeah</i> 563 0...