Zombieland: Double Tap

in one of these. It was so... 527 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:20,400 Oh, shit. 528 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:26,076 What? 529 00:33:27,400 --> 00:33:29,456 Man, we're getting good at this. Columbus. 530 00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:30,480 Tallahassee. 531 00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:34,476 The hood is 12 o'clock, trunk is 6. You're our eyes. Yes. 532 00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:37,792 Hey, don't worry, you guys. 533 00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:40,873 They are much more afraid of us than we are of them. 534 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:43,634 God, that is not even remotely true. 535 00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:45,313 Well, what do I do? 536 00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:47,631 You know how cheerleaders form a pyramid? Yeah. 537 00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:51,037 You know how the three on the bottom anchor the pyramid? Oh, yeah. 538 00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:54,033 I don't give a shit what you do, just stay out of my way. 539 00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,430 Okay, 8 o'clock. Eight o'clock. 540 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:59,752 Did you say the front was 12? Oh, fuck me. Sorry. Two o'clock. 541 00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:02,719 Eleven! Eleven! Seven-thirty! 542 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:04,837 Six o'clock. Six! 543 00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:06,036 I'll get 6. 544 00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:09,160 Shit. One-fifteen. 545 00:34:09,200 --> 00:34:11,510 One-thirteen, 1:20. I don't know. It's moving that way. 546 00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,035 Why is everyone shouting numbers? Eleven! 547 00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:16,000 Twelve! Six! 548 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:18,676 Two o'clock! 549 00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:20,200 Eight. 550 00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:23,153 Six o'clock. Shit. 551 00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:28,679 One o'clock. Six-thirty. 552 00:34:30,720 --> 00:34:32,359 Ten! Eight! 553 00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,750 Eight o'clock! Eight! Shit. 554 00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:36,760 Shit! 555 00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:45,160 Narsty! Thank you. 556 00:34:45,240 --> 00:34:46,240 You're welcome. 557 00:34:46,241 --> 00:34:47,159 One o'clock! 558 00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:49,356 Two-thirty! Three! One! 559 00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:52,480 Okay. I'll get 3. 560 00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:55,840 Right on time, Columbus. 561 00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,350 One o'clock! Ten-thirty! 562 00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:02,795 Eleven! Eleven! 563 00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:04,519 Actually, you know what, it's a Homer. 564 00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:08,037 Abort! Abort 11. Don't waste a bullet. Hawking! 565 00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:10,476 Hawking! What? Oh, shit. Oh, shit. 566 00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:17,520 Ha-ha-ha! Yay! 567 00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:21,710 Ah! He's trying to bite me! Ninja! Ninja! 568 00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:23,120 Oh, my God! 569 00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:26,831 You saved me. 570 00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:28,274 All right. Settle down. 571 00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:35,510 Hey, Tal, 1 o'clock. Pardon me, Pop-Tart. 572 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:37,193 Not quite done yet. 573 00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:47,875 What the fuck? 574 00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:54,352 Try to dodge me, motherfucker. 575 00:35:56,160 --> 00:36:02,191 <i>This was our first T-800, named for the Terminator it-fucking-self.</i> 576 00:36:03,760 --> 00:36:05,274 Tal? Yup? 577 00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:12,354 <i>T-800s were a mutated strain of zombie,</i> 578 00:36:12,480 --> 00:36:15,678 <i>stronger, deadlier and harder to kill.</i> 579 00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:20,270 One plus one is still two, right? 580 00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:31,074 <i>They were the apex predator, top of the food chain.</i> 581 00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:33,994 <i>Single-minded and relentless like their namesake,</i> 582 00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:38,438 <i>once they locked on to a target, T-800s stopped at nothing to devour their prey.</i> 583 00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:41,750 What the ever-loving fuck? 584 00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:55,360 Ew. 585 00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:58,674 <i>Seeing that T-800 firsthand was all the more worrisome</i> 586 00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:03,312 <i>knowing that Little Rock was out there with nothing but a hippie and a guitar.</i> 587 00:37:04,440 --> 00:37:08,912 ♪ Like a rolling stone ♪ 588 00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:14,477 Okay. That song is amazing. 589 00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:15,596 Did you write that? 590 00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:20,237 Wa... Was that a dumb question? 591 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,358 Sorry, I was like 11 when the zombies took over. Not a dumb question. 592 00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:26,512 I was laughing because you think I'd play you some stupid cover song. 593 00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:27,756 No, of course I wrote it. 594 00:37:27,840 --> 00:37:30,912 If you love that, then you're really gonna love this. 595 00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:34,755 But it's a work in progress, so be gentle. 596 00:37:36,200 --> 00:37:40,991 ♪ If I leave here tomorrow ♪ 597 00:37:43,640 --> 0...