Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy

[chuckles] 800 00:39:05,145 --> 00:39:08,481 But I think you'll find that sort of language is a little outmoded 801 00:39:08,515 --> 00:39:10,750 -in the workplace. -No, I mean flustered. 802 00:39:10,784 --> 00:39:12,485 Are you going through the, uh, you know? 803 00:39:14,988 --> 00:39:18,124 Bridget, let me introduce you to Talitha. 804 00:39:18,158 --> 00:39:21,761 [Talitha] Richard, what am I supposed to do with this, huh? 805 00:39:21,795 --> 00:39:23,596 Does it climb? Does it stand on one leg? 806 00:39:23,630 --> 00:39:26,132 Does it do cartwheels? It's a tortoise. It doesn't do anything. 807 00:39:26,166 --> 00:39:28,635 [producer] He can't pull out. Who the fuck does he think he is? 808 00:39:28,668 --> 00:39:30,670 Arrogant, self-important prick. 809 00:39:30,704 --> 00:39:33,907 Tell that selfish arsehole he can rot in hell. 810 00:39:33,940 --> 00:39:35,809 The Dalai Lama's cancelled. 811 00:39:35,842 --> 00:39:37,877 Twat. Shit. 812 00:39:37,911 --> 00:39:40,980 Okay, we've got an hour till we're on air. 813 00:39:41,014 --> 00:39:42,749 We need a replacement. Let me make a call. 814 00:39:42,782 --> 00:39:44,050 I do Krav Maga with Fergie. 815 00:39:44,084 --> 00:39:45,819 Duchess or Black Eyed Pea? 816 00:39:45,852 --> 00:39:47,887 Duchess. She could be here in 45. 817 00:39:47,921 --> 00:39:51,725 Talitha, meet Bridget Jones. Best producer we've ever had. 818 00:39:51,758 --> 00:39:52,859 [Bridget] Oh. 819 00:39:52,892 --> 00:39:54,594 I'm sure you're very good too. 820 00:39:54,627 --> 00:39:55,762 Huge fan. 821 00:39:55,795 --> 00:39:56,996 Hold this. 822 00:39:57,030 --> 00:39:58,898 Loved your early work from Chechnya. 823 00:39:58,932 --> 00:40:02,502 [chuckles] Now I'm doing features on incontinent tortoises. 824 00:40:02,535 --> 00:40:03,770 Fergie. 825 00:40:03,803 --> 00:40:05,572 Are those glutes burning up? 826 00:40:05,605 --> 00:40:06,172 Hello. 827 00:40:06,206 --> 00:40:08,608 -Hey. Sorry. -Right. 828 00:40:08,641 --> 00:40:12,012 Uh, right. Let's get rid of this set, please, now! 829 00:40:12,045 --> 00:40:14,014 So, what do you think? 830 00:40:14,047 --> 00:40:15,782 Can we lure you back? 831 00:40:15,815 --> 00:40:17,784 [Talitha] Fergie's in. 832 00:40:17,817 --> 00:40:21,054 Does anyone know how to get tortoise piss out of silk? 833 00:40:21,087 --> 00:40:23,656 Blotting and mild detergent. 834 00:40:24,657 --> 00:40:25,992 When can I start? 835 00:40:28,294 --> 00:40:31,097 [Bridget] Am rejoining ranks of London's employed 836 00:40:31,131 --> 00:40:34,801 and meaningfully contributing to society. 837 00:40:34,834 --> 00:40:39,673 Can walk with head held high and be role model for Billy and Mabel, 838 00:40:39,706 --> 00:40:44,244 saving them from otherwise certain future as alcoholic wards of the state. 839 00:40:46,613 --> 00:40:49,616 [Pamela] It's super that the television's invited you back. 840 00:40:49,649 --> 00:40:52,052 Of course, I always stayed at home when you were little. 841 00:40:52,085 --> 00:40:53,019 [Bridget] Classic Mum. 842 00:40:53,053 --> 00:40:54,688 Can't really talk, Mum. 843 00:40:54,721 --> 00:40:56,856 I've got to tidy up before the nanny gets here. 844 00:40:56,890 --> 00:40:58,224 A nanny? Really? 845 00:40:58,258 --> 00:41:01,861 Mummy doesn't love us anymore. Ow! 846 00:41:01,895 --> 00:41:04,731 [Bridget] Ever since Mum and Una moved into Audsley House, 847 00:41:04,764 --> 00:41:07,267 the retirement home we have to pretend is a hotel, 848 00:41:07,300 --> 00:41:09,102 the phone calls have been the same. 849 00:41:09,135 --> 00:41:11,771 [Una] Any men on the horizon, Bridget? 850 00:41:11,805 --> 00:41:14,874 Well, there's got to be someone. Some people don't mind a widow. 851 00:41:14,908 --> 00:41:16,576 [Bridget] Stings a bit. 852 00:41:16,609 --> 00:41:18,578 [Pamela] Beggars can't be choosers, Bridget. 853 00:41:18,611 --> 00:41:21,614 And now, look, we're in the hotel kitchen 854 00:41:21,648 --> 00:41:24,284 -doing salmon in the sous vide. -[phone beeps] 855 00:41:24,317 --> 00:41:26,619 I mean, it's basically boil-in-the-bag, 856 00:41:26,653 --> 00:41:28,988 but everybody's doing it these days. 857 00:41:29,022 --> 00:41:31,591 [Bridget] Roxster. Definite development. 858 00:41:31,624 --> 00:41:33,126 [Mum] Cooking's never really been your thing. 859 00:41:33,159 --> 00:41:35,762 -[doorbell rings] -Oh, must go. Bye, Mum! 860 00:41:35,795 --> 00:41:36,796 [Pamela] Bye, bye. 861 00:41:36,830 --> 00:41:38,198 Oh, God, it's her. 862 00:41:40,967 --> 00:41:42,569 Hi, I'm Chloe. 863 00:41:43,703 --> 00:41:44,671 Hello. 864 00:41:46,172 --> 00:41:47,974 [Bridget] What the actual fuck? 865 00:41:48,008 --> 00:41:50,643 She looks like a film star. 866 00:41:50,677 --> 00:41:52,145 Chloe, this is Mabel. 867 00:41:52,178 --> 00:41:54,914 Look, I can play the recorder with my nose. 868 00:41:54,948 --> 00:41:56,683 [plays recorder] 869 00:41:56,716 --> 00:41:59,019 Children, this is Chloe. 870 00:41:59,052 --> 00:42:01,021 She's going