Cheaper by the Dozen

- Diane called. My book's getting published. 343 00:30:10,686 --> 00:30:13,897 - Didn't I say we'd have it all? - You've never said that. 344 00:30:13,939 --> 00:30:16,108 I'm telling you now, baby. 345 00:30:23,031 --> 00:30:27,286 Oh, my God. Can you guys please wait till I leave the room? 346 00:30:27,327 --> 00:30:29,872 Can you hurry? 347 00:30:29,913 --> 00:30:32,040 - There's one thing. - What? 348 00:30:32,082 --> 00:30:35,836 They asked me to go to New York for a few days. 349 00:30:40,340 --> 00:30:43,135 That was a good O, as in OK. 350 00:30:43,177 --> 00:30:47,431 It's not the best timing, but you're going to New York. I can handle this. 351 00:30:47,472 --> 00:30:50,100 - You'll manage? - Yeah. 352 00:30:50,142 --> 00:30:55,147 You haven't been home much, Tom, since we moved here. 353 00:30:55,189 --> 00:30:57,983 You're gonna have to shop for school supplies, 354 00:30:58,025 --> 00:31:01,737 get them dressed and bathed, put them to bed at night... 355 00:31:01,778 --> 00:31:04,823 Been there, done all that. 356 00:31:04,865 --> 00:31:09,161 - You're considering this? - I'm not considering it. You're going. 357 00:31:09,203 --> 00:31:12,414 Nora can help me out around the house. 358 00:31:13,498 --> 00:31:17,920 - New York. Wow. - Yeah. Wow. 359 00:31:19,046 --> 00:31:22,257 Every once in a while... 360 00:31:23,675 --> 00:31:26,803 I carve a pumpkin 361 00:31:26,845 --> 00:31:32,893 With a knife made of lollipop sticks... 362 00:31:32,935 --> 00:31:36,813 It totally sucks. I miss you, too, but I gotta get a job. 363 00:31:36,855 --> 00:31:41,026 Hi, Lorraine. OK. I'll try and be there, honey. 364 00:31:41,068 --> 00:31:45,697 Hi, Kimmy. Yeah. I know I haven't been very friendly recently... 365 00:31:45,739 --> 00:31:49,493 - They're pulling me in again. - Tell them you can't do it. 366 00:31:49,535 --> 00:31:55,999 Could you hang on a second? That's easy for you to say, you're an only child. 367 00:31:59,503 --> 00:32:04,466 - It might be fun to baby-sit together. - No. Whoa, no. 368 00:32:04,508 --> 00:32:06,885 You know what happened last time we visited. 369 00:32:06,927 --> 00:32:10,889 - They were welcoming you into the family. - They set me on fire. 370 00:32:10,931 --> 00:32:13,433 Just your pants. 371 00:32:13,475 --> 00:32:15,602 Honey, I am an actor, OK? 372 00:32:15,644 --> 00:32:20,148 Sure, last time it was just my pants, but what if next time it's my face? 373 00:32:20,190 --> 00:32:22,317 This is the money maker. 374 00:32:22,359 --> 00:32:27,990 I'm not that good an actor. This is how I get the jobs. I'm man enough to admit it. 375 00:32:28,031 --> 00:32:31,535 - Please? - Don't look at me like that. 376 00:32:31,577 --> 00:32:34,162 - Please, please, please? - You always do that to me. 377 00:32:34,204 --> 00:32:38,125 Fine. We'll go, but one thing happens and I'm gone. 378 00:32:38,166 --> 00:32:42,129 And no fires. And we sleep in the same room. 379 00:32:42,171 --> 00:32:44,089 Kimmy, put Dad on. 380 00:32:45,799 --> 00:32:49,845 She'll help us out if they can stay in the same room. 381 00:32:49,887 --> 00:32:52,723 No way. No. She knows the rules. 382 00:32:52,764 --> 00:32:55,934 She wants to have her own room when she's here. Isn't that sweet? 383 00:32:55,976 --> 00:32:57,060 No. 384 00:32:57,102 --> 00:33:01,773 Why don't you just come over on Sunday and we'll talk logistics? 385 00:33:01,815 --> 00:33:03,942 All right. Bye. 386 00:33:03,984 --> 00:33:07,988 - Doorknob man isn't baby-sitting too? - Yes. He very well might be. 387 00:33:08,030 --> 00:33:11,533 - And do not set his pants on fire again. - Classic. 388 00:33:12,993 --> 00:33:15,787 It was just his pants. 389 00:33:15,829 --> 00:33:21,251 Is anybody besides me thinking our happier and stronger life is nastier and suckier? 390 00:33:21,293 --> 00:33:23,462 First Dad forces us to move. 391 00:33:23,504 --> 00:33:27,174 Then Mom decides to become a career person and travel the globe. 392 00:33:27,216 --> 00:33:29,801 We have to take orders from Hank the model/actor. 393 00:33:29,843 --> 00:33:32,304 And he hates kids too. 394 00:33:33,388 --> 00:33:37,142 Nora's blind to his evil. We have no choice but to intervene. 395 00:33:37,184 --> 00:33:40,521 We've got 48 hours. Let's work a plan. 396 00:33:46,193 --> 00:33:50,656 All right. Appleschmear season is officially open. 397 00:33:50,697 --> 00:33:51,782 Hooray. 398 00:33:51,823 --> 00:33:58,789 Future president of the United States, Sarah Baker, will throw the first apple. 399 00:34:00,332 --> 00:34:04,753 Come on. Bring on the chin music, baby. Let's go. 400 00:34:06,129 --> 00:34:08,005 Yes. 401 00:34:08,047 --> 00:34:10,676 It's an apple, and now it's sauce. 402 00:34:22,062 --> 00:34:27,860 Appleschmear. It's the game my great-grandma Gilb