Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

681 00:39:01,240 --> 00:39:04,540 Now, that's one of the nastiest wrecks you'll ever see. 682 00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:06,840 Oh, no, no, no. 683 00:39:07,040 --> 00:39:09,040 It's all right. You're safe. 684 00:39:09,240 --> 00:39:11,140 - You're safe. - We got you. We're here. 685 00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:12,640 I'm on fire. 686 00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:15,140 It's all right. It's all right, you're not on fire! 687 00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:19,140 - You're lying! I'm on fire! - There is no fire. 688 00:39:19,340 --> 00:39:21,840 - I'm on fire. I don't wanna die. - Come back here. 689 00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:25,640 But something looks wrong. I mean, he's running around like he's on fire. 690 00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:29,540 Oh, my God! Help me! I don't wanna die! Stop, drop, and roll! 691 00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:33,240 - You're not on fire, Ricky Bobby! - I'm on fire! 692 00:39:33,540 --> 00:39:34,840 You're not on fire. 693 00:39:35,540 --> 00:39:38,340 But I'm not even sure he even knows where he's at right now. 694 00:39:38,640 --> 00:39:43,440 This makes us all realize the kind of pressure these drivers are under. 695 00:39:43,540 --> 00:39:45,040 Mr. Bobby, come on down here. 696 00:39:45,340 --> 00:39:48,840 Help me, Jesus! Help me, Jewish God! 697 00:39:49,140 --> 00:39:50,640 Help me, Allah! 698 00:39:52,140 --> 00:39:53,340 Help me, Tom Cruise! 699 00:39:53,440 --> 00:39:56,140 But how did he get down to his underwear that fast? 700 00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:59,540 Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me! 701 00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:01,040 Look. Here, help's coming. 702 00:40:01,340 --> 00:40:03,040 - Wait a minute! - It's Cal Naughton. 703 00:40:04,140 --> 00:40:07,440 Oh, God! Please don't let the invisible fire burn my friend! 704 00:40:08,540 --> 00:40:12,040 I got you! I got you, man! I'll help you! 705 00:40:12,340 --> 00:40:16,040 He's jumping on Ricky, trying to put the nonexistent fire out. 706 00:40:16,240 --> 00:40:17,740 Now, that's a teammate right there. 707 00:40:17,940 --> 00:40:19,540 This is going downhill fast. 708 00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:22,540 It would be a great time to go to commercial break. 709 00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:24,840 Help me, Oprah Winfrey! 710 00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:30,640 You know, Larry, there's good days in racing, and there's bad days. 711 00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:34,140 Ricky Bobby just had himself a bad day. 712 00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,140 He's suffering from catatonic shock. 713 00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:47,840 His injuries are minor, but right now he can't deal with the trauma of the wreck. 714 00:40:48,140 --> 00:40:51,240 Golly, this is a hard decision. 715 00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:56,340 But I have thought about it, and I want the plug pulled. 716 00:40:56,540 --> 00:40:57,840 Yeah. 717 00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,340 Ma'am, your husband's not dying. 718 00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:02,740 He's just taking a nap. 719 00:41:03,440 --> 00:41:05,240 - Just look at him. - No, I'm not lying. 720 00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:07,640 I've never seen him make that noise. Ever. 721 00:41:09,140 --> 00:41:11,340 Got more plugs in him than a Circuit City. 722 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:16,240 Oh, baby. Mama loves you so much. 723 00:41:16,940 --> 00:41:20,440 Hey, Ricky. It's me, Cal. 724 00:41:20,740 --> 00:41:25,040 Just want you to know, I got your back, bro. No matter what. 725 00:41:25,940 --> 00:41:28,440 There's something I want to get off my chest... 726 00:41:28,540 --> 00:41:32,440 and it's about that summer when you went away to community college. 727 00:41:32,540 --> 00:41:36,240 I got a offer to do Playgirl magazine... 728 00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:38,840 and I did it. 729 00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:42,240 I did a full spread for Playgirl magazine. 730 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:46,640 I mean spread, man. I pulled my butt apart and stuff... 731 00:41:47,340 --> 00:41:51,240 and I was totally nude, and it was weird. 732 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:53,140 You probably didn't hear about it... 733 00:41:53,340 --> 00:41:55,540 because I went under the name of Mike Honcho. 734 00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:57,440 But I just wanted you to know that. 735 00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:01,440 If you could hear me, if it got into your brain somehow... 736 00:42:01,640 --> 00:42:03,840 that I spread my butt cheeks as Mike Honcho. 737 00:42:04,140 --> 00:42:06,940 "Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret. 738 00:42:07,240 --> 00:42:11,040 Gretchen, my friend, got her period. I'm so jealous, God. 739 00:42:11,340 --> 00:42:14,240 I hate myself for being so jealous, but I am. 740 00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:16,540 I wish you'd help me just a little. 741 00:42:16,840 --> 00:42:21,340 Nancy's sure she's going to get it soon too. And if I'm last..." 742 00:42:21,740 --> 00:42:24,540 Hey, Ricky. Ricky! 743 ...