Gunless

- Larry, we talked about this. Please don't badger our guest. 420 00:28:36,423 --> 00:28:37,840 - Ahem. 421 00:28:39,634 --> 00:28:41,885 Εleven. 422 00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:48,058 l have killed 1 1 men. 423 00:28:48,226 --> 00:28:50,978 And they each earned their bullet of their own accord. 424 00:28:53,314 --> 00:28:55,149 l've been called out four times. 425 00:28:55,316 --> 00:28:57,234 l've responded in self-defence twice. 426 00:28:57,402 --> 00:29:00,654 - l think duelling is incredibly romantic! 427 00:29:02,198 --> 00:29:03,991 - Dear... 428 00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:07,202 - Three men called me a cheat in a Κansas City card game. 429 00:29:07,370 --> 00:29:10,205 And one time l came across a man beating a dog. 430 00:29:10,373 --> 00:29:13,333 Βad. l mean, real bad. 431 00:29:13,501 --> 00:29:14,543 - Gravy? 432 00:29:14,711 --> 00:29:17,838 - Βut the first man l killed, well... 433 00:29:18,006 --> 00:29:20,340 the first man l killed 434 00:29:20,508 --> 00:29:21,842 killed my pa. 435 00:29:23,303 --> 00:29:25,262 He had black eyes, black beard, black soul. 436 00:29:25,430 --> 00:29:27,139 He and my pa got into it 437 00:29:27,307 --> 00:29:29,767 over an unbranded calf my pa knew to be his. 438 00:29:29,934 --> 00:29:33,312 So they settled matters with fisticuffs and my pa gave him a whoopin'. 439 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,063 Βut as he rode away, 440 00:29:35,231 --> 00:29:38,275 that lying coward shot him in the back. 441 00:29:41,654 --> 00:29:43,197 - That is so sad! 442 00:29:43,364 --> 00:29:44,615 - Yeah. So the next day, 443 00:29:44,783 --> 00:29:47,326 l rode up to his porch. l called him out, 444 00:29:47,494 --> 00:29:49,912 and my first shot punched him in the gut. 445 00:29:52,332 --> 00:29:56,335 Now, if you know anything about killing - 446 00:29:56,503 --> 00:29:58,170 l'm sure you all do - 447 00:29:58,338 --> 00:30:00,547 you know that a gut shot is the ugliest way 448 00:30:00,715 --> 00:30:03,091 to do it. Κeeps you livin' just long enough to... 449 00:30:03,259 --> 00:30:04,635 to experience 450 00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:07,304 every second of pain. 451 00:30:08,681 --> 00:30:10,182 And after an hour 452 00:30:10,350 --> 00:30:13,435 of him kinda whinin' and moanin' and whimperin', 453 00:30:13,603 --> 00:30:16,480 l had it. So l shot him right here. 454 00:30:17,690 --> 00:30:19,233 That was that. 455 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:21,026 He was dead. 456 00:30:26,491 --> 00:30:29,576 - So then Jack will make it an even dozen. 457 00:30:29,744 --> 00:30:31,578 - He's not shooting Jack. 458 00:30:31,746 --> 00:30:34,206 - Yeah, l am. 459 00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:36,208 l tell you what... 460 00:30:36,376 --> 00:30:39,253 l'd kill for some more potatoes. 461 00:31:01,401 --> 00:31:02,609 - Ah... Dang. 462 00:31:09,576 --> 00:31:10,909 Good morning, sir! 463 00:31:11,077 --> 00:31:13,203 Ahem. Corporal J.T. Κent, 464 00:31:13,371 --> 00:31:16,039 Northwest Mounted Police, Fort McNeil troop. 465 00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:22,212 And this is my liaison and guide, Κ'Wala. 466 00:31:22,380 --> 00:31:23,964 - People call me Two Dogs. 467 00:31:24,132 --> 00:31:26,967 - And? - As per the standing directive 468 00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:29,344 of Her Majesty's government in the Dominion of Canada, 469 00:31:29,512 --> 00:31:31,805 l am making the rounds of the southwest sector 470 00:31:31,973 --> 00:31:34,975 of our allotted region. 471 00:31:35,143 --> 00:31:36,685 Thank you. 472 00:31:38,187 --> 00:31:39,646 - And? 473 00:31:39,814 --> 00:31:41,690 - And, as part of my rounds, 474 00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:46,153 l'm under instructions to check in with all adults - 475 00:31:46,321 --> 00:31:48,697 men... new men... and women - 476 00:31:48,865 --> 00:31:51,325 and households in my zone. 477 00:31:51,492 --> 00:31:53,410 - So...? 478 00:31:53,578 --> 00:31:54,661 - So. 479 00:31:56,289 --> 00:31:58,790 How's it going? - Good. 480 00:31:58,958 --> 00:32:00,751 - Any problems? - None. 481 00:32:00,919 --> 00:32:02,502 - Concerns? - No. 482 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:06,173 - Ahem. Very well, then. 483 00:32:06,341 --> 00:32:07,341 Sign here, please. 484 00:32:07,508 --> 00:32:09,676 - What is this? 485 00:32:09,844 --> 00:32:12,220 - A rounds journal. You sign it after l check in. 486 00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:15,891 - You ain't from around here, are ya? - America. 487 00:32:16,059 --> 00:32:18,810 - Oh... Still have to sign. 488 00:32:18,978 --> 00:32:22,439 We need your true full name, please. 489 00:32:24,359 --> 00:32:26,526 - Mm... 490 00:32:26,694 --> 00:32:29,988 - Not a smuggler, are you? - No. 491 00:32:30,156 --> 00:32:31,990 - Whiskey trader? - No. 492 00:32:32,158 --> 00:32:34,284 - Horse thief. - No. 493 00:32:36,371 --> 00:32:38,997 - All right. Good