Adventureland

457 00:31:14,956 --> 00:31:16,206 No, in that case, 458 00:31:16,290 --> 00:31:18,709 there were actually a few times that I... 459 00:31:18,793 --> 00:31:20,043 Yeah, a few times I could've done that. 460 00:31:20,128 --> 00:31:22,963 But it wasn't... It wasn't exactly right. 461 00:31:23,047 --> 00:31:26,049 Wait, so you're telling me you're a virgin? 462 00:31:26,134 --> 00:31:28,886 - There were circumstances... - Oh, my God! 463 00:31:28,970 --> 00:31:30,178 - Oh, my God. - No, I went... 464 00:31:30,263 --> 00:31:34,683 Okay, all right, for example, junior year, I was dating this girl, Betsy Cooke. 465 00:31:34,767 --> 00:31:38,854 Betsy was kind of, like... She was kind of a prude, actually. 466 00:31:38,938 --> 00:31:41,106 Anyway, one day, I was reading Shakespeare, 467 00:31:41,190 --> 00:31:46,445 and I realized I don't really love this person. You know? 468 00:31:46,529 --> 00:31:48,947 It was one of the sonnets. 469 00:31:49,032 --> 00:31:51,116 "Being your slave, what should I do 470 00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:54,912 "but tend upon the hours and times of your desires?" 471 00:31:54,996 --> 00:32:00,042 And I realized I don't want to tend to Betsy's hours or her times. 472 00:32:00,126 --> 00:32:01,501 All right, that doesn't matter. 473 00:32:01,586 --> 00:32:04,713 Anyway, I drove to Betsy's house, and I was literally about to tell her, 474 00:32:04,797 --> 00:32:06,715 and that's the night she said she wanted to have sex. 475 00:32:06,799 --> 00:32:09,676 Can you believe it? It was the same... You know, it was the same night, so... 476 00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:12,304 And you didn't just fuck her anyway? 477 00:32:15,350 --> 00:32:16,350 No. 478 00:32:18,519 --> 00:32:23,774 So what about you and intercourse? 479 00:32:23,858 --> 00:32:26,985 - Can you stop saying "intercourse"? - Sure, sure. 480 00:32:28,070 --> 00:32:29,613 I don't know. There were guys in high school, 481 00:32:29,697 --> 00:32:32,366 and then, like, there were other ones. 482 00:32:33,284 --> 00:32:36,954 - Were you in love with any of them? - No. Hell no. 483 00:32:37,872 --> 00:32:38,872 Got you. 484 00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:42,960 Oh, hey, it's Connell. Hey, Connell! 485 00:32:43,044 --> 00:32:44,962 - Jimbo. - Hey, you know this place? 486 00:32:45,046 --> 00:32:48,340 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody knows this is my joint. 487 00:32:50,218 --> 00:32:51,802 These guys work at the park. This is Ronnie. 488 00:32:51,886 --> 00:32:53,804 Nice to meet you. 489 00:32:53,888 --> 00:32:55,597 - Hi. - Hey. 490 00:32:55,682 --> 00:32:58,141 We're gonna go meet some friends in the back. 491 00:32:58,226 --> 00:32:59,309 Cool. 492 00:33:00,979 --> 00:33:03,355 Do it! My nephew! 493 00:33:08,820 --> 00:33:11,154 Is that Connell's wife? She's, like, really pretty. 494 00:33:11,239 --> 00:33:12,698 Yeah, she is. 495 00:33:12,907 --> 00:33:16,076 She works at that lame disco, Razzmatazz. 496 00:33:17,870 --> 00:33:20,747 - It's kind of sad. - Oh, yeah? I've never been there. 497 00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:25,085 No, I mean their marriage is sad. He didn't want it. Now he's trapped. 498 00:33:31,384 --> 00:33:34,594 Are you sure you want to go? The band is really awful. 499 00:33:34,679 --> 00:33:37,222 - Yeah, I just needed some air. - Okay. 500 00:34:33,820 --> 00:34:37,908 - Hey, can we go somewhere? - Yeah. 501 00:35:04,602 --> 00:35:05,685 Hey. 502 00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:30,627 - You made out with her? - Yeah. Yeah, I just kissed her. 503 00:35:30,710 --> 00:35:33,880 I don't know what came over me. It was incredible. 504 00:35:34,382 --> 00:35:38,051 Cool, man. How was that? 505 00:35:39,345 --> 00:35:43,223 Fantastic. Joel, she's like... She's, like, perfect, you know? 506 00:35:43,766 --> 00:35:45,851 - Good for you, man. - Yeah. 507 00:35:45,935 --> 00:35:47,853 I got to open my booth. 508 00:36:00,740 --> 00:36:02,492 Hey, do you have an ice-pick I can jam into my ears? 509 00:36:02,577 --> 00:36:04,202 I can't listen to this song again. 510 00:36:04,287 --> 00:36:08,623 I don't, but I have this. 511 00:36:10,418 --> 00:36:12,794 - Be cool with that. - Okay. Thanks. 512 00:36:16,257 --> 00:36:20,010 - Were you on a date last night? - I wouldn't call it a date. 513 00:36:20,094 --> 00:36:21,511 Not into Em? 514 00:36:22,763 --> 00:36:24,723 No, she's great. She's great. I just... 515 00:36:24,807 --> 00:36:26,016 I don't know if I'm ready for a girlfriend yet. 516 00:36:26,100 --> 00:36:28,852 I'm kind of getting over a broken heart. 517 00:36:29,103 --> 00:36:32,981 - I hope you didn't tell her that. - Why? 518 00:36:34,942 --> 00:36:37,194 You told her that, didn't you? 519 00:36:37,278 --> 00:36:40,322 James, no girl wants to hear about some other chick you're hard up for. 520 00:36:40,406 --> 00:36:43,658 - Right