Connie and Carla

00:31:32,925 --> 00:31:35,327 - Hi, I'm Paul. - I'm Brian. My stage name's "Patty Melt." 555 00:31:36,762 --> 00:31:40,066 By day, I'm Robert. This is my roommate, Lee. 556 00:31:40,166 --> 00:31:43,235 By night, we're a duo act Peaches N' Cream. 557 00:31:43,335 --> 00:31:45,237 - I hate our name. - I think it's beautiful. 558 00:31:45,337 --> 00:31:48,074 That's because you're the Peaches part, I'm N' Cream. 559 00:31:48,174 --> 00:31:52,211 My name is N' Cream. What does it even mean? 560 00:31:55,314 --> 00:31:57,816 - CARLA: That's really nice. - Fabulous. 561 00:31:57,916 --> 00:32:00,419 Come, come on, come on, join us. 562 00:32:06,192 --> 00:32:08,194 All queens rise. 563 00:32:13,165 --> 00:32:15,467 O blessed Saint Mary of Drag Queens, 564 00:32:15,567 --> 00:32:17,836 please grant your never humble servants 565 00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,072 and our new friends with grace, 566 00:32:20,172 --> 00:32:22,108 jewels and support hose. 567 00:32:22,208 --> 00:32:24,843 - ALL: Gay-men. - Gay-men. 568 00:32:24,943 --> 00:32:26,845 And bless me with a new name. 569 00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:28,847 - Hello? - I don't even have a drag name. 570 00:32:28,947 --> 00:32:30,316 - Why not? - What's up with that? 571 00:32:30,416 --> 00:32:32,851 I'm new, so I can't name myself. 572 00:32:32,951 --> 00:32:35,554 - You want N' Cream? - No, thanks. 573 00:32:35,654 --> 00:32:37,123 - Rosemary Chicken. - Eh. 574 00:32:37,223 --> 00:32:39,058 - Mary Queen of Shots? - Uh-uh. 575 00:32:39,158 --> 00:32:41,393 - Estée Louder Harder Faster? - What? 576 00:32:41,493 --> 00:32:44,896 - Ooh, can I borrow this? - Hey, hey, what time is it? 577 00:32:44,997 --> 00:32:48,134 - 5:00-ish? - The show. 578 00:32:48,234 --> 00:32:50,269 We have to shave... everything. 579 00:32:50,369 --> 00:32:52,071 You're lucky to be paid to perform. 580 00:32:52,171 --> 00:32:53,472 - Sorry? - Excuse me? 581 00:32:53,572 --> 00:32:55,674 - What? - ALL: Perform. 582 00:32:55,774 --> 00:32:58,544 There are very few paying drag gigs in this town. 583 00:32:58,644 --> 00:33:01,347 I have to bartend at the Handlebar, and it's beneath me. 584 00:33:01,447 --> 00:33:03,282 So, here it is. 585 00:33:03,382 --> 00:33:06,718 Have you ever thought about adding a few fabulous friends to your show? 586 00:33:06,818 --> 00:33:09,388 If you need choreography, I know fabulous dance steps. 587 00:33:09,488 --> 00:33:12,024 - I'm great with wigs. - I can sew a dress in three hours. 588 00:33:12,124 --> 00:33:13,159 I'll lend you my jewels. 589 00:33:14,393 --> 00:33:17,729 Call us. We could use the buck. 590 00:33:19,398 --> 00:33:21,700 - We'll give it some thought. - Great. 591 00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:25,071 Excellent. Come on, you guys, let's go clean our apartment. 592 00:33:25,171 --> 00:33:27,005 - For your brother? - You invited him over? 593 00:33:27,106 --> 00:33:28,307 - Are you drunk? - A little. 594 00:33:28,407 --> 00:33:30,209 Robert left home when was just 16. 595 00:33:30,309 --> 00:33:33,079 - ROBERT: Brian! - I'm glad I don't have a straight brother. 596 00:33:33,179 --> 00:33:36,115 Now, now, we mustn't be prejudiced, straights are people too. 597 00:33:41,753 --> 00:33:43,489 Come on. 598 00:33:46,725 --> 00:33:49,461 Look at all the people, Carla. 599 00:33:51,163 --> 00:33:53,199 - (DOOR SLAMS) - (BOTH SCREAM) 600 00:34:00,739 --> 00:34:03,942 <i>♪ Don't tell me not to live, ♪ ♪ just sit and putter ♪</i> 601 00:34:04,042 --> 00:34:06,745 <i>♪ Life's candy ♪ ♪ and the sun's a ball of butter ♪</i> 602 00:34:06,845 --> 00:34:11,950 <i>♪ Don't bring around a cloud ♪ ♪ to rain on my parade ♪</i> 603 00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:15,087 <i>♪ Don't tell me not to fly, ♪ ♪ I've simply got to ♪</i> 604 00:34:15,187 --> 00:34:17,823 <i>♪ If someone takes a spill ♪ ♪ it's me and not you ♪</i> 605 00:34:17,923 --> 00:34:23,095 <i>♪ Who told you you're allowed ♪ ♪ to rain on my parade? ♪</i> 606 00:34:23,195 --> 00:34:26,332 <i>♪ I'm gonna live ♪ ♪ and live now ♪</i> 607 00:34:26,432 --> 00:34:29,535 <i>♪ Get what I want, ♪ ♪ I know how ♪</i> 608 00:34:29,635 --> 00:34:32,804 <i>♪ One roll ♪ ♪ for the whole shebang ♪</i> 609 00:34:32,904 --> 00:34:35,241 <i>♪ One throw, that bell ♪ ♪ will go clang ♪</i> 610 00:34:35,341 --> 00:34:38,510 <i>♪ Eye on the target ♪ ♪ and wham ♪</i> 611 00:34:38,610 --> 00:34:41,780 <i>♪ One shot, one gunshot ♪ ♪ and bam! ♪</i> 612 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:46,385 <i>♪ Hey, Mr. Arnstein ♪</i> 613 00:34:46,485 --> 00:34:53,359 <i>♪ - Here I am! ♪</i> - (CHEERING) ♪ 614 00:34:53,459 --> 00:34:59,398 <i>♪ I'll march my band out ♪</i> 615 00:34:59,498 --> 00:35:03,835 <i>♪ I'll beat my drum ♪</i> 616 00:35:03,935 --> 00:35:07,473 <i>♪ And if I'm fanned out ♪</i> 617 00:35:07,573 --> 00:35:10,276 <i>♪ Your turn at bat, sir ♪</i> 618 00:35:10,376 --> 00:35:14,146 <i>♪ - At least I didn't fake it - ♪ ♪ Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it ♪</i> 619 00:35:14,246 --> 00:35:16,748 <i>♪ Get ready for me, love, ♪ ♪ 'cause I'm a comer ♪</i> 620 00:35:1