Bank of Dave

703 00:34:44,291 --> 00:34:46,583 Hugh Stockwell from Bentham and Green. 704 00:34:47,791 --> 00:34:48,958 Oh, you work with… Lawrence. 705 00:34:49,041 --> 00:34:51,583 -Yeah, Clarence. Yes. -[Charles] Clarence? 706 00:34:51,666 --> 00:34:52,583 Oh… 707 00:34:54,125 --> 00:34:55,291 I've never met the man. 708 00:34:55,375 --> 00:34:58,625 In fact, until yesterday, I'd never even heard of him. [laughs] 709 00:34:58,708 --> 00:35:01,000 But, anyway, you're here now, so… 710 00:35:01,083 --> 00:35:02,583 How can I be of service? 711 00:35:02,666 --> 00:35:03,666 Firstly, thank you. 712 00:35:03,750 --> 00:35:07,208 Everybody tells me you're the country's leading expert on the banking system. 713 00:35:07,291 --> 00:35:09,875 Oh, well. I've put in my time. 714 00:35:10,791 --> 00:35:11,666 I'll be brief. 715 00:35:11,750 --> 00:35:16,500 I represent a client who is looking into establishing a new retail bank. 716 00:35:17,166 --> 00:35:18,833 [whispers] Not an American, I hope. 717 00:35:18,916 --> 00:35:23,208 [laughs] No. The gentleman in question is definitely English. 718 00:35:23,291 --> 00:35:24,208 -Yah. -Um… 719 00:35:24,291 --> 00:35:26,250 The question is more about scale. 720 00:35:26,791 --> 00:35:29,875 In the rest of the economy, we have large and small companies. 721 00:35:29,958 --> 00:35:33,000 We have a chain of supermarkets and corner shops. 722 00:35:33,083 --> 00:35:35,291 -Greengrocers, butchers. -Your point? 723 00:35:35,375 --> 00:35:36,708 Well, my point is, 724 00:35:36,791 --> 00:35:40,250 why do all banks have to be like supermarkets? 725 00:35:41,041 --> 00:35:43,041 Isn't there room for a few corner shops? 726 00:35:45,500 --> 00:35:47,208 You're talking about Hoares. 727 00:35:48,541 --> 00:35:49,375 Am I? 728 00:35:49,458 --> 00:35:51,708 Oldest bank in the country, tiny. 729 00:35:52,583 --> 00:35:56,500 Caters for very exclusive clientele, old money. 730 00:35:56,583 --> 00:35:59,375 No. Wh… What about people on the other end of the spectrum? 731 00:35:59,458 --> 00:36:00,708 New money? 732 00:36:00,791 --> 00:36:01,708 No money. 733 00:36:03,708 --> 00:36:04,625 [puzzled laugh] 734 00:36:05,666 --> 00:36:09,708 I'm not… quite sure what you're getting at, Mr Stockwell, 735 00:36:09,791 --> 00:36:12,666 but there is no right size of bank. 736 00:36:12,750 --> 00:36:14,875 The FRB exists to make sure 737 00:36:14,958 --> 00:36:19,083 that people's hard-earned money is entrusted to the… [inhales] 738 00:36:19,166 --> 00:36:21,375 …well, right kind of chap. 739 00:36:22,250 --> 00:36:24,708 -[Hugh] The type of chap you can trust? -Precisely. 740 00:36:24,791 --> 00:36:28,541 If their job is selecting the type of chap you can trust… 741 00:36:29,875 --> 00:36:31,083 [puffs] …you'd have to admit 742 00:36:31,166 --> 00:36:33,875 they've been doing a pretty piss-poor job, haven't they? 743 00:36:34,375 --> 00:36:37,041 -I beg your pardon. -Anyway, thank you, Sir Charles. 744 00:36:37,125 --> 00:36:41,458 My client<i> is</i> the type of chap people in his community can trust. So… 745 00:36:42,333 --> 00:36:44,208 I'm sure there won't be any problems. 746 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:46,041 Thank you. 747 00:36:55,750 --> 00:36:56,583 [grunts] 748 00:36:56,666 --> 00:36:59,458 -[Hugh] What do you think? <i>-</i>[Dave, on phone] <i>Looks bloody fantastic.</i> 749 00:37:00,166 --> 00:37:02,291 Wouldn't be surprised if they say yes. 750 00:37:02,375 --> 00:37:04,958 [chuckles] I don't know about that, Dave. 751 00:37:05,041 --> 00:37:09,708 I'm going to hand-deliver this to the FRB on Friday, so speak soon. 752 00:37:09,791 --> 00:37:10,625 Okay? 753 00:37:11,375 --> 00:37:12,333 Cheers. 754 00:37:13,541 --> 00:37:15,041 How was your day, anyway? 755 00:37:15,541 --> 00:37:16,875 [sighs] Fraught. 756 00:37:16,958 --> 00:37:18,958 Everyone was being incredibly nice to me, 757 00:37:19,041 --> 00:37:21,333 which is a sure sign they're gonna get rid of you. 758 00:37:21,416 --> 00:37:23,125 -How about you? -Ah… 759 00:37:23,208 --> 00:37:25,166 I had a meeting with Sir Charles Denbigh. 760 00:37:27,125 --> 00:37:28,833 -You're kidding. -Yeah, I did. 761 00:37:29,666 --> 00:37:31,666 -He's a legend. -Is he, though? 762 00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:35,083 Yes. He was tipped to be the possible governor 763 00:37:35,166 --> 00:37:37,125 of the Bank of England before the recession. 764 00:37:37,208 --> 00:37:38,666 What did he want to talk about? 765 00:37:38,750 --> 00:37:41,000 Nothing. I was picking his brains about something. 766 00:37:41,083 --> 00:37:44,333 -Um… -Meetings with Sir Charles Denbigh. 767 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,083 -Secret trips to the North. -Hmm. 768 00:37:47,166 --> 00:37:49,791 -It's hardly secret, Hen. -What are you involved in, Hugh? 769 00:37:49,875 --> 00:37:51,875 -Not involved… -Come on, spill. 770 00:37:53,833 --> 00:37:56,583 I'm filling the formal paperwork out at the end of the week, 771 00:37:56,666 --> 00:37:58,625 so till then, it has to be just between us. 772 00:37:5