And Now for Something Completely Different

00:31:51,898 --> 00:31:54,106 and taking the following routes: 383 00:31:54,189 --> 00:31:56,689 from Manchesters, down through Oxfords... 384 00:31:56,731 --> 00:31:59,731 taking the M1.5 through Londons to Purleys... 385 00:31:59,773 --> 00:32:02,816 then the A25s from Purleys to Dovers. 386 00:32:02,899 --> 00:32:05,649 Thence Africas to Nairobis. 387 00:32:05,732 --> 00:32:10,357 We take the south roads out of Nairobis for about 12 miles and then ask. 388 00:32:10,399 --> 00:32:13,525 - Does anyone speak Swahili? - Most of them do down there. 389 00:32:13,608 --> 00:32:16,483 No. Does anyone in our party speak Swahili, sir? 390 00:32:16,566 --> 00:32:19,400 - Well, Matron's got a smattering. - Apart from the two Matrons. 391 00:32:19,483 --> 00:32:21,900 Good Lord. I forgot about her. 392 00:32:21,941 --> 00:32:24,526 Apart from them, who else is coming on our expedition? 393 00:32:24,609 --> 00:32:27,817 Well, we've got the Arthur Brown twins... 394 00:32:27,901 --> 00:32:31,443 two botanists called Madchen, the William Johnston brothers... 395 00:32:31,526 --> 00:32:34,526 - Two of them. - Four. Pair of identical twins. 396 00:32:34,568 --> 00:32:37,401 Two of the Harry Baker quads and you two. 397 00:32:38,109 --> 00:32:41,402 - And none of these are mountaineers? - Well, you two are. 398 00:32:41,444 --> 00:32:44,153 And we've got a brace of guides called Jimmy Blankensoft... 399 00:32:44,236 --> 00:32:47,569 because Kilimanjaro is a pretty tricky climb. 400 00:32:47,611 --> 00:32:50,736 Most of it's up, till we reach the very top... 401 00:32:50,819 --> 00:32:53,402 and then it tends to slope away rather sharply. 402 00:32:53,485 --> 00:32:57,111 But Jimmy's put his heads together and worked out a way up. Jimmy 403 00:32:58,779 --> 00:33:01,987 Jimmy Blankensoft, Arthur Wilson. Arthur Wilson, Jimmy Blankensoft. 404 00:33:02,070 --> 00:33:03,695 Jimmy Blankensoft Two, Arthur Wilson Two. 405 00:33:03,737 --> 00:33:06,029 Arthur Wilson Two, Jimmy Blankensoft One. 406 00:33:06,071 --> 00:33:09,405 - Carry on, Jimmy. - Don't worry about the... 407 00:33:09,489 --> 00:33:11,738 We'll get him up, all right. 408 00:33:18,072 --> 00:33:22,697 Well, I'd better describe the route. We start off simply up Kilimanjaro... 409 00:33:25,406 --> 00:33:27,989 Quite simple. No problem there, basically. 410 00:33:28,073 --> 00:33:32,448 And then we go on to the main face itself of Kilimanjaro. 411 00:33:32,532 --> 00:33:34,949 It's a bit difficult here because... 412 00:33:39,406 --> 00:33:41,825 There's a difficult bit 'round here when you've got to go... 413 00:33:41,908 --> 00:33:45,367 from the end of the mantel-piece onto the coffee table. 414 00:33:45,409 --> 00:33:48,491 It's a bit of a difficult jump. We don't need those. 415 00:33:48,574 --> 00:33:52,242 Then you've got the rail up here, which is quite a good fortune. 416 00:33:52,325 --> 00:33:56,534 There's a terribly easy bit over the floor up onto the chair. 417 00:33:56,575 --> 00:33:58,659 And then we've got... 418 00:34:00,410 --> 00:34:02,535 We get down. We go quite simplistic. 419 00:34:07,243 --> 00:34:09,326 He'll be leading the first assault. 420 00:34:09,410 --> 00:34:12,035 I'm afraid I shan't be coming on your expedition, sir... 421 00:34:12,119 --> 00:34:16,578 'cause I have absolutely no confidence in anyone involved in it! 422 00:34:18,745 --> 00:34:20,244 Oh. dear. 423 00:34:22,037 --> 00:34:24,411 - What about you? - I'm game, sir. 424 00:34:24,453 --> 00:34:26,412 Jolly good. 425 00:34:28,995 --> 00:34:30,203 Good Lord! 426 00:34:57,915 --> 00:34:59,873 And now for something completely different. 427 00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:02,207 - Inspector! - Yes, sir? 428 00:35:02,248 --> 00:35:04,873 I was sitting on a park bench and I put my coat down. 429 00:35:04,915 --> 00:35:09,207 When I picked it up, I found my wallet had gone and �15 had been stolen. 430 00:35:09,248 --> 00:35:12,791 - Did you see anyone? - No, no one at all. 431 00:35:14,916 --> 00:35:17,667 Well, there's very little we can do about that, sir. 432 00:35:27,250 --> 00:35:29,751 Do you want to come back to my place? 433 00:35:34,168 --> 00:35:36,167 Yeah, all right. 434 00:36:13,713 --> 00:36:16,629 And so Miss Spume returned to her typing... 435 00:36:16,713 --> 00:36:18,838 and dreamed her little dreamy dreams... 436 00:36:18,921 --> 00:36:23,047 unaware of the cruel trick fate had in store for her. 437 00:36:23,130 --> 00:36:25,589 For Miss Spume was about to fall victim... 438 00:36:25,672 --> 00:36:30,048 of the dreaded international Chinese communist conspiracy 439 00:36:30,089 --> 00:36:32,381 Yes, these fanatical fiends... 440 00:36:32,423 --> 00:36:36,132 under the leadership of the so-called Mao Tse-tung... 441 00:36:36,216 --> 00:36:40,508 had