Alfie

This is so unlike me. 434 00:30:33,787 --> 00:30:36,289 Yeah, you... you two just... 435 00:30:44,423 --> 00:30:46,884 <i>I used to think there was nothing worse than death.</i> 436 00:30:50,304 --> 00:30:52,347 <i>Then, from out of nowhere...</i> 437 00:30:55,559 --> 00:30:56,685 the unthinkable. 438 00:30:58,896 --> 00:31:01,774 Now, I really don't get what everyone sees in you. 439 00:31:06,487 --> 00:31:09,323 It just keeps on happening and happening. 440 00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,410 Or more accurately, not happening and not happening. 441 00:31:15,579 --> 00:31:19,041 This never happens, Uta. Honestly, never. 442 00:31:22,336 --> 00:31:23,546 Honestly. 443 00:31:24,421 --> 00:31:26,090 Not the word around town. 444 00:31:28,426 --> 00:31:29,593 "Peewee." 445 00:31:35,433 --> 00:31:36,892 - Mr. Elkins? - Yes. 446 00:31:36,976 --> 00:31:38,060 Miranda Kulp. 447 00:31:40,187 --> 00:31:41,480 Miranda. 448 00:31:42,023 --> 00:31:44,859 The penis doctor is a he with a little bit of she thrown in. 449 00:31:44,942 --> 00:31:48,279 So I understand you're experiencing some erectile dysfunction. 450 00:31:49,030 --> 00:31:52,950 I am experiencing a little... a little bit of... 451 00:31:53,034 --> 00:31:54,076 What you just said. 452 00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:56,537 Not to worry. That's my area of expertise. 453 00:31:57,413 --> 00:32:01,876 So have you been under any unusual emotional stress lately, Mr. Elkins? 454 00:32:01,959 --> 00:32:05,546 Stress? Emotional? Me? No, never. 455 00:32:07,382 --> 00:32:11,261 Well, unless you count... that recent chat I had with Julie. 456 00:32:11,928 --> 00:32:13,555 I can't see you anymore, Alfie. 457 00:32:15,557 --> 00:32:17,851 - Why? You angry? - No, I'm really not angry. 458 00:32:17,934 --> 00:32:21,271 Just, you know, we want different things. 459 00:32:22,605 --> 00:32:25,567 And I can't have you traipsing in and out of Max's life. 460 00:32:30,739 --> 00:32:32,741 You've changed your hair, haven't you? 461 00:32:33,783 --> 00:32:35,035 - You have, haven't you? - Yeah. 462 00:32:35,118 --> 00:32:36,453 No, you have. You've changed your hairdo. 463 00:32:36,536 --> 00:32:39,122 You cut it? It looks gorgeous. 464 00:32:39,706 --> 00:32:41,207 - Thanks. - How come... 465 00:32:43,126 --> 00:32:44,669 How come you never... had it like that 466 00:32:44,753 --> 00:32:46,129 when... we were together? 467 00:32:46,213 --> 00:32:47,631 I really gotta go. 468 00:32:51,843 --> 00:32:55,597 Well, I guess you need these back. 469 00:32:58,767 --> 00:33:00,018 Thank you. 470 00:33:04,773 --> 00:33:05,857 Alfie? 471 00:33:07,192 --> 00:33:08,485 You gonna be okay? 472 00:33:09,569 --> 00:33:12,030 Yeah. No worries. I'm always okay. 473 00:33:18,036 --> 00:33:21,540 All righty, let's take a gander at that penis of yours. 474 00:33:29,757 --> 00:33:30,883 I see. 475 00:33:36,096 --> 00:33:37,973 - Hello. - Well. 476 00:33:38,557 --> 00:33:41,393 - It seems we have lift-off. - It seems we do. 477 00:33:41,477 --> 00:33:42,561 <i>Wunderschön.</i> 478 00:33:43,479 --> 00:33:44,772 What a relief. 479 00:33:45,648 --> 00:33:47,149 Well, I mean, if he can give me a stiffy 480 00:33:47,233 --> 00:33:48,776 I should have no problem keeping it up 481 00:33:48,859 --> 00:33:51,445 for the target demographic, shouldn't I? 482 00:33:51,529 --> 00:33:54,448 Well, there doesn't appear to be anything physiologically wrong. 483 00:33:54,532 --> 00:33:56,158 - No. - So, in short 484 00:33:56,242 --> 00:33:59,578 we can be fairly certain your problem was simply stress-related. 485 00:33:59,662 --> 00:34:02,081 Translation, Julie-related. 486 00:34:02,164 --> 00:34:04,542 Like I always say, if they don't get you one way 487 00:34:04,917 --> 00:34:06,294 they'll get you another. 488 00:34:07,837 --> 00:34:08,879 However... 489 00:34:10,298 --> 00:34:14,135 I did feel something a little kooky. 490 00:34:14,927 --> 00:34:16,053 Kooky? 491 00:34:16,137 --> 00:34:18,890 There is nothing to get upset about, Mr. Elkins. 492 00:34:19,849 --> 00:34:22,977 I thought I felt a lump... 493 00:34:25,063 --> 00:34:26,355 on your penis. 494 00:34:27,231 --> 00:34:29,067 But with any luck, it will be nothing. 495 00:34:31,694 --> 00:34:34,572 The words "lump" and "penis" in the same sentence. 496 00:34:35,365 --> 00:34:37,158 There's something you don't hear every day. 497 00:34:38,868 --> 00:34:43,081 <i>And so young Alfred got an early Yuletide gift.</i> 498 00:34:44,874 --> 00:34:46,793 A penis biopsy. 499 00:34:47,335 --> 00:34:49,045 I get my test results in three days... 500 00:34:49,129 --> 00:34:52,048 Well, five. Five counting the weekend. 501 00:34:52,132 --> 00:34:54,342 Oh, Lord... 502 00:34:54,551 --> 00:34:57,053 How am I gonna stop myself going completely bonkers