The Blair Witch Project

Not about us getting lost. 460 00:21:18,967 --> 00:21:22,347 We're making a documentary about a witch. 461 00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:25,017 l have a camera. Doesn't hurt because 462 00:21:25,017 --> 00:21:28,767 we'll all look back on this and laugh heartily, believe me. 463 00:21:28,767 --> 00:21:31,027 Baby steps, man, baby steps. 464 00:21:31,027 --> 00:21:32,857 Just breathe and don't look down, maybe? 465 00:21:32,857 --> 00:21:35,527 -No, you've got to look down. -You're gonna have to crawl. 466 00:21:35,527 --> 00:21:36,817 -I'm hitting the crawl. -Cool. 467 00:21:36,817 --> 00:21:38,907 Think about how cool the fucking cemetery 468 00:21:38,907 --> 00:21:42,497 is gonna be when we get there. 469 00:21:43,367 --> 00:21:45,827 Think of the joy of being in a really good film. 470 00:21:45,827 --> 00:21:48,877 -Okay, shut the fuck up. -Okay, I'm quiet. 471 00:21:48,877 --> 00:21:49,997 Shit. How am I gonna do this? 472 00:21:49,997 --> 00:21:53,047 -Okay, Mikey? -Yeah? 473 00:21:53,047 --> 00:21:55,257 Dude, there's no way you're coming across 474 00:21:55,257 --> 00:21:56,757 with your DAT on your belly, man. 475 00:21:56,757 --> 00:22:00,047 -No way, man. -There's no chance. 476 00:22:00,057 --> 00:22:01,387 How are we going to get the DAT across then? 477 00:22:01,387 --> 00:22:02,717 It's really fucking hard, man. 478 00:22:02,717 --> 00:22:04,557 -How are we gonna get the DAT across? -The one this morning 479 00:22:04,557 --> 00:22:05,887 with the moss was cool. 480 00:22:05,887 --> 00:22:11,447 -This is slippery as shit. -How are we gonna get the DAT across? 481 00:22:12,147 --> 00:22:14,687 I don't know. Let me get out of here and put my pack down. 482 00:22:14,687 --> 00:22:16,737 I'll just go back and forth. 483 00:22:16,737 --> 00:22:18,407 You want to go back and forth? You could do it that way. 484 00:22:18,407 --> 00:22:19,567 I didn't want to do this at all, but... 485 00:22:19,567 --> 00:22:20,777 Okay, let's do... 486 00:22:20,777 --> 00:22:23,497 Yeah, we'll do it back and forth. 487 00:22:24,537 --> 00:22:25,997 What'd you drop? 488 00:22:25,997 --> 00:22:28,417 I didn't drop anything. 489 00:22:28,417 --> 00:22:29,997 -The tree just broke on me. -The log broke. 490 00:22:29,997 --> 00:22:31,287 Oh, fuck. 491 00:22:31,287 --> 00:22:35,347 We're very, very, very close now. 492 00:22:36,127 --> 00:22:39,057 You guys excited? 493 00:22:40,597 --> 00:22:42,427 Okay. 494 00:22:42,427 --> 00:22:45,147 What's this? 495 00:22:51,187 --> 00:22:52,977 What is this? 496 00:22:52,977 --> 00:22:55,737 Dude. Guys? 497 00:22:55,857 --> 00:23:00,277 Do you remember something that Mary Brown said the other day? 498 00:23:00,277 --> 00:23:02,947 What was the story from the Bible that she was telling us? 499 00:23:02,947 --> 00:23:05,787 Fuck, I wasn't listening to her 'cause I thought she was a lunatic. 500 00:23:05,787 --> 00:23:09,117 It was Esau, but it was something about a pile of rocks. 501 00:23:09,117 --> 00:23:12,037 She was totally telling us about her rocks, man. 502 00:23:12,037 --> 00:23:15,957 What the fuck was it about a pile of rocks? 503 00:23:15,957 --> 00:23:19,087 Does anybody remember? 504 00:23:19,087 --> 00:23:22,887 -"To live your life..." -This is like... 505 00:23:22,887 --> 00:23:26,137 -"Live your life..." -Looks like an Indian burial ground, man. 506 00:23:26,137 --> 00:23:32,067 See, I don't know if this counts. Three... Four... 507 00:23:33,517 --> 00:23:37,577 Five... Six... 508 00:23:38,067 --> 00:23:39,277 Seven. 509 00:23:39,277 --> 00:23:43,947 Witches in days gone by were roasted just like my Vienna sausage. 510 00:23:43,947 --> 00:23:46,327 Flames are licking you like the devil there, Josh. 511 00:23:46,327 --> 00:23:50,537 Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale A tale of a fateful trip 512 00:23:50,537 --> 00:23:54,917 That started on this desert isle Aboard this tiny ship 513 00:23:54,917 --> 00:24:00,297 Yeah, but this ship has a good captain, not a fat, beer-guzzling guy in a blue shirt. 514 00:24:00,297 --> 00:24:02,507 He wasn't beer-guzzling. 515 00:24:02,507 --> 00:24:04,177 They had no beer on the island, man. 516 00:24:04,177 --> 00:24:08,017 If they'd had beer, they would have had, like, big-ass orgies. 517 00:24:08,017 --> 00:24:12,767 You're kind of like the Captain and Mike's kind of like your Gilligan. 518 00:24:12,767 --> 00:24:14,097 -No offense. -That's all right. 519 00:24:14,107 --> 00:24:18,937 I mean that as a compliment. Gilligan was a funny guy. 520 00:24:18,937 --> 00:24:21,237 The Captain was fat, though. 521 00:24:21,237 --> 00:24:23,407 Well. Okay, let's call it a thin captain... 522 00:24:23,407 --> 00:24:26,867 Let's not call it "the Captain" anymore, you illiterate TV people. 523 00:24:26,867 --> 00:24:29,657 It's t...