Rent-A-Pal

for breaking a fresh carton of eggs. 559 00:36:28,061 --> 00:36:30,268 Mom hit me so hard with a yardstick 560 00:36:30,271 --> 00:36:33,934 that it snapped in half, broke the skin. 561 00:36:33,942 --> 00:36:35,398 Oh, wow. 562 00:36:37,696 --> 00:36:40,233 That sounds like a tough time, pal. 563 00:36:40,240 --> 00:36:42,231 I'm sorry to hear about that. 564 00:36:42,242 --> 00:36:43,242 = thanks. 565 00:36:44,119 --> 00:36:46,576 Hey, now I don't know about you 566 00:36:46,579 --> 00:36:48,365 but this is really bumming me out. 567 00:36:48,373 --> 00:36:51,786 So, how about we talk about something fun? 568 00:36:51,793 --> 00:36:55,035 Okay, do you have a girlfriend? 569 00:36:57,173 --> 00:36:58,173 Oh. 570 00:36:59,008 --> 00:37:00,589 Oh. 571 00:37:00,593 --> 00:37:02,299 Ah, shoot. I'm sorry, man. 572 00:37:02,303 --> 00:37:03,964 I shouldn't have brought it up. 573 00:37:03,972 --> 00:37:05,132 No, no. 574 00:37:05,140 --> 00:37:10,100 It's, I just, I've been doing this video dating service 575 00:37:10,979 --> 00:37:15,018 for like six months and 1 finally got a match today 576 00:37:17,235 --> 00:37:18,235 but I fucked it up. 577 00:37:20,405 --> 00:37:21,986 You know, I can relate to that. 578 00:37:21,990 --> 00:37:23,275 I really can. 579 00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:29,823 Okay, so one time I had a blind date all lined up. 580 00:37:29,831 --> 00:37:31,867 It was for my senior prom. 581 00:37:31,875 --> 00:37:34,287 So, my buddy and I are going 582 00:37:37,172 --> 00:37:38,833 you know what happened? 583 00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:42,332 The girl tells me she's sick 584 00:37:42,343 --> 00:37:44,129 and she has to skip the dance. 585 00:37:45,513 --> 00:37:46,719 So I had to go by myself. 586 00:37:46,723 --> 00:37:47,678 But it's fine. 587 00:37:47,682 --> 00:37:50,264 Like, I don't mind being lonely. 588 00:37:51,352 --> 00:37:52,592 I mean, it's not like I'm gonna 589 00:37:55,899 --> 00:37:57,435 so here I am. 590 00:37:57,442 --> 00:38:02,402 I'm at this stupid prom alone, standing in the back 591 00:38:04,032 --> 00:38:08,492 and who do I see dancing 592 00:38:08,495 --> 00:38:10,736 with Curtis millegan? 593 00:38:10,747 --> 00:38:11,577 Who? 594 00:38:11,581 --> 00:38:13,947 My date! 595 00:38:13,958 --> 00:38:16,290 That lying hag! 596 00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:18,376 It was unbelievable. 597 00:38:18,379 --> 00:38:19,710 Do you know what I did next? 598 00:38:19,714 --> 00:38:21,170 What? 599 00:38:21,174 --> 00:38:22,380 Good guess, but no. 600 00:38:23,301 --> 00:38:26,885 I blew my fucking top at her. 601 00:38:26,888 --> 00:38:30,426 Like in front of everyone. 602 00:38:30,433 --> 00:38:34,767 I was yelling so loud they had to stop the music 603 00:38:34,771 --> 00:38:37,808 and bring in the chaperones. 604 00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:38,646 Whoa. 605 00:38:38,650 --> 00:38:41,062 My buddy had to come over and calm me down 606 00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:43,185 before I started hitting people. 607 00:38:43,196 --> 00:38:45,187 It was unreal. 608 00:38:46,658 --> 00:38:48,398 But my friend said something to me that night 609 00:38:48,409 --> 00:38:49,774 that I'll never forget. 610 00:38:50,954 --> 00:38:54,947 He said, "Andy, my man, you didn't miss out 611 00:38:54,958 --> 00:38:56,494 oh a date with her. 612 00:38:56,501 --> 00:38:59,243 She missed out on a date with you. 613 00:38:59,254 --> 00:39:01,165 So forget about her. 614 00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:04,460 You are entitled to the things you want.” 615 00:39:05,802 --> 00:39:07,133 He straightened my collar, 616 00:39:07,136 --> 00:39:09,001 he patted me on the shoulder, 617 00:39:09,013 --> 00:39:10,219 and we ended up having 618 00:39:10,223 --> 00:39:14,091 one of the most fun nights of our lives together. 619 00:39:14,102 --> 00:39:16,844 Dancing and drinking, just going crazy. 620 00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:18,846 Oh man, it was great. 621 00:39:19,816 --> 00:39:23,559 Besides, I got what I wanted from her eventually. 622 00:39:23,570 --> 00:39:25,185 So everything worked out. 623 00:39:26,781 --> 00:39:28,897 Anyway, after that night 624 00:39:28,908 --> 00:39:31,194 I'm always reminded of my friend 625 00:39:31,202 --> 00:39:32,738 and how he was there for me 626 00:39:32,745 --> 00:39:33,951 when I was down and out. 627 00:39:35,707 --> 00:39:37,413 That's what friends are for. 628 00:39:38,376 --> 00:39:40,037 To be there for each other 629 00:39:40,044 --> 00:39:41,659 when all the chips are down. 630 00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:45,000 And that's why I'm here for you, pal. 631 00:39:46,384 --> 00:39:47,624 It reminds me of a saying. 632 00:39:48,887 --> 00:39:51,970 Sometimes you don't realize your own strength 633 00:39:51,973 --> 00:39:55,716 until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. 634 00:39:57,103 --> 00:39:58,434 So forget that girl. 635 00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:00,720 We don't need her. 636 00:40:00,732 --> 00:40:02,688 We have each other. 637 00:40:02,692 --> 00:40:05,058 Now let's have a good time. 638 00:40:05